We owe the New York Times a debt of enormous gratitude for exposing Donald Trump as the misogynist and woman hater he is. That distinguished journal has just completed a masterpiece of investigative journalism in which it dug into the dark past of this monster and uncovered two pieces of disgusting conduct that should be enough to deter any right thinking person from voting for him. The first is that many years ago he said ‘Hmmm’ to a young lady. Just three letters, but they speak volumes about Trump’s evil agenda. A ‘hmmm’ means only one thing: ‘I see you as a sex object and want to take you to my penthouse and do despicable things to you, you vixen.’ In fact, a ‘hmmm’ is probably worse than a leer, the subject of my pivotal work with the Human Rights Commission (see ‘Brown Study’ The Spectator Australia 16 April). And can you imagine the effect of having half the population sleazing their way through life with nothing but a ‘hmmm’ on their evil lips and aimed at every woman they see. The second black mark against this monster is that, 30 years ago, he appointed a woman to the top job in his building company and, shudder the thought, head of construction of Trump Towers, an appointment that sent shock waves through the rugged building industry of New York. Even his poor old dad said how revolted he was by the prospect of having a woman in such a blokey job. But the poor woman, trapped in Trump’s Svengali-like grip, stayed in the job for years and, deluded thing that she is, says she is grateful to Trump for giving her this so-called responsibility. If Trump were half a man, he would have found her a job as a hairdresser, sent her flowers, called her ‘Honey’ and told her to get married and clean the kitchen. But no, he exposed her to the cut throat world of the building industry where it is every man for himself. He should be given 3 months on Nauru or Manus Island. And if he is allowed to go around saying ‘hmmm’ and giving tough jobs to women, next he will be advocating lower taxes, border security, jobs, banning illegal migrants and putting his country first. Where will it all end?

At the same time, that other paragon of virtue, the Age, has also been making a real contribution to equality. It has been ecstatic at the message brought to Australia by Iris Bohnet, professor of public policy at Harvard, who has been tackling the stubborn obstacles in the way of minorities seeking employment. You see, the system conspires to stop virtually everyone but professors of public policy at Harvard from getting a job because of the bias that the capitalist system uses to protect its own and exclude outsiders. Professor Bohnet’s reforms are built on the practice of progressive orchestras who now interview musicians from behind a curtain. Apparently until the curtain was co-opted, we had only ‘all-male, all-white orchestras’, hot beds of bias and discrimination. Now they are arcadias of happiness, even if not good orchestras. Professor Bohnet’s reforms are now available for companies and job agencies. First step is to stop job applicants from putting their names on the application form, and of course their age and sex. Headshots on a resume are definitely out. Photos of past male leaders of an organisation are also banned, as is noting that the interviewee is wearing your favourite shade of blue or using note paper of any colour, as they activate all sorts of biases. Attractive people are out because they only look honest. And all gender language is to be ‘purged’. I used to think naively that to employ women and minorities you first had to know that they actually were women or minorities. But now, not only have I woken up to the need for reform, but I can see one that is long overdue: everyone applying for a job should wear a burka.

In an age when we are not allowed to have heroes, I am pleased to say that I have one, Beau Abela, still at the tender age of 22. I like the name Beau, as it conjours up romantic images of river boat gamblers and 18th century rakes. More importantly, young Beau has become a role model who has shown initiative and an inventive turn of mind, a pathfinder to productive forms of endeavour which could unlock vast and hitherto untapped fields of economic activity and community wealth. Now, Beau did not go to some posh private school, but was under the tutelage of the Victorian Department of Education. The only problem was that he did not learn anything. He was not taught to read and, as a result, could not use a bus time table or read a menu. Nor could he count money, disqualifying him from all employment other than that of shadow treasurer. But Beau was not one to wallow in his inadequacy or play the victim. He showed real initiative and sued the government for not educating him. After 8 years of litigation at your expense, the government gave in and settled, giving him a million dollars. And personal development training. And a car. And $800,000 in costs. Thus, Beau has shown by his own courageous example just what you can do with litigation. You can add value to your uselessness, make money and contribute to the employment of lawyers, clerks and psychologists, relieving the state from the burden of supporting them. He should be an ambassador for The Age of Innovation and Ideas. Nor is Beau one who rests on his laurels, as he picked up a trade, becoming a car thief. And this itself has unleashed a well spring of compassion, as a magistrate has just awarded young Beau a no conviction and put him on a good behaviour bond. Forget Biggles; my hero is Beau Abela.