I miss the days when Australian politicians were only interested in solving Australian problems. Maybe that was never the case, and I’m experiencing the Mandela effect – remembering history differently because I wish it so.

Doesn’t it all feel like one giant psyop? As if everything is meticulously crafted to distract us from the fact that Australia is slowly bleeding out from self-inflicted wounds.

It doesn’t matter who’s in power – the opposition always ‘has the solution’ and the ruling party always defends the current backwards stance.

A perfect example can be found in Labor’s election promise (paraphrasing): ‘If elected, we will hold a Royal Commission into the handling of the Covid pandemic because the LNP was wrong. They’re protecting their federal MPs.’

LNP: ‘Nah. No way! We did the right thing. Definitely no corruption here…’

Then, after Labor wins the election, the story changes.

LNP: ‘Where’s the Royal Commission you promised? What Labor did during the pandemic was wrong! They’re protecting their State Premiers.’

Labor: ‘Nah. No way! We did the right thing. Definitely no corruption here…’

When a party wins an election, it becomes their job to protect the government’s interests (that they now represent) – aka cover up the bad behaviour of predecessors. Like an out-of-control avalanche, governments protect each other. Again, and again. Assured mutual destruction keeps the whole system in check.

Here’s the funny part – want to vote for the only viable minor parties? Greens openly support Palestine; One Nation openly supports Israel.

What if you don’t care about other countries and want to focus solely on Australian interests? You’re an insensitive racist!

Don’t want to pick a side? You’re an insensitive racist!

Pick the wrong side? You’re an insensitive racist!

Want to reduce power prices by creating more coal plants? You hate the planet and you’re an insensitive racist.

Do you oppose destroying farming and agricultural industries by building massive wind and solar farms provided by China on fertile farmland to ‘save the planet from global warming’? You hate the planet and you’re an insensitive racist.

Oppose lowering immigration numbers so Australians can have a chance at owning a home? You hate foreigners and you’re an insensitive racist.

Concerned that Woke politics imported from the US is causing irreversible cultural erosion, undermining traditional family values and morals, leaving Aussie kids homeless, fatherless, and confused about their gender? You’re an insensitive racist and a bigot.

No matter your stance on any issue – there’s always someone ready to call you an ‘ist’. Like magic, they just appear, as if conjured by an unbreakable curse placed on you by a wandering gypsy.

Death by a thousand cuts, and how easily we are distracted day to day.

Thousands will march in the streets demanding a ceasefire in Gaza – but how many protest for Sudan or Haiti? How many Australians could find Ukraine on a map, yet we gave them a billion dollars?

Thousands will march in the streets demanding an end to gender-based violence – but how many protest against genital mutilation practices in Africa and the Middle East? Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander women are 33 times more likely to be hospitalised and six times more likely to die from domestic violence than non-Indigenous women, but if you protest against First Nations men, you’re a racist.

Thousands will march in the streets demanding a fix to the youth crime wave – but how many protest for the kids in the Congo forced to work in cobalt mines so the environmentally-conscious can have fancy electric vehicles? Kids are starving to death in Africa while most people in the West are obese, so how does that track?

People are told what to get mad about, when to get mad, and exactly what to say when being mad. Fancy slogans to slap on little protest signs – BLM, MeToo, Free Palestine…

Do you have an unauthorised thought? Bam – bipartisan support for the e-Safety Censorship Machine.

There will always be another distraction, another movement, another pandemic, another armed conflict – always in a loop, always repeating, and the entire time, our politicians give themselves pay rises year after year.

At the next federal election, who are you voting for: Israel or Palestine? You have to choose, and either way, you’re wrong.

Please do enjoy the new Australia.

Hey, maybe I’m wrong too, because by the time we have another election it will be bird flu, a war in Africa, and a movement about how Trump is trying to start a civil war.